Welcome to my world of helping women, men, and couples have better, more intimate relationships.

I want you to enjoy more love, security, pleasure, and fun.

I'm here to support you in breaking free from frustrating patterns and open up new possibilities for deeper intimacy.

Maybe you tied the knot in your twenties, and now, after two decades, both of you have changed and you're seeking guidance on how to find happiness in the present.

Or perhaps you find yourself newly single in your 30s or 40s, feeling anxious about a dwindling libido, and longing to rediscover your passion as you embark on a new relationship.

Whether you're looking to mend difficulties in your current relationship, enhance what you already have, or explore the path to a healthy new connection, I'm here to lend a helping hand. With my wealth of research-based knowledge and years of experience in building intimacy, I can guide you on this journey.

I'm constantly learning and evolving myself. I actively practice the intimacy exercises I teach, and just like you, my own relationships experience ups and downs, navigating through challenges and embracing moments of pure joy.

My dedication is to share with you the very best of what I'm discovering. Through sessions with me, my online courses, my podcast 'Intimacy Matters,' and my in-person workshops, I aim to empower you with the tools and insights you need to cultivate a life of love, expansion, joy, meaning, and depth.


Hello, I'm Nicola of Real Relationships I help women, men and couples to rebuild heart connection, rediscover passion and build extraordinary and real relationships.  My work interweaves mind, body, heart, soul and sex. Here are some things you might like to know about me! 

๐Ÿ“š๐Ÿ“š I’m a total bibliophile - if you love Esther Perel, Gina Ogden, John Welwood, David Richo, Thomas Moore - you’re in the right place.

๐Ÿง˜๐Ÿง˜  I’m learning how to occupy my body. I used to be stuck in my head. I love to share the latest discoveries about mind-body connection that I learn through my own practices of meditation, yoga, dance, somatic experiencing and The Wheel of Consent practices.

๐Ÿ’–๐Ÿ’– Love is my life’s work. Each of our hearts hold so much power to transform our wounds. I’m fortunate to be based close to Glastonbury - the Heart Chakra of the Planet.

๐Ÿซถ๐Ÿซถ Relationship work is soul work. In my soul I deeply know that love is mysterious and impossible to pin down and classify. 

โค๏ธ‍๐Ÿ”ฅโค๏ธ‍๐Ÿ”ฅ I have healed the sexual shaming of a Catholic upbringing and now I feel called to teach the innocence and healing potential of our natural sexuality. 

My Story

When I was 30 my partner went missing. He eventually came back after several months travelling the world (he just neglected to tell me!)

I went on to spend my thirties numbing out with socialising and getting busy. I dated - and it was arduous and frustrating and rarely fun.

One thing became clearer as I began to question the conventional paths I was seeing all around me , was that I wanted meaning and fulfilment in my life and to do work that matters. Healthy relationships had become fascinating to me.

I decided to retrain and leave the corporate world of marketing. It took me over a decade but slowly but surely I retrained. First as an NLP and career coach and then as a couples, sex and relationship therapist.

The real catalyst for me was a truly transformational 18 month training in 2010/2011 with my amazing relationship and spiritual teacher Jan Day.

I have been through several relationship beginnings and endings, a partner’s cancer diagnosis, and a healing journey of discovery around my own sexuality and spiritual essence. I also walked the Camino de Santiago in 2017.

My approach now integrates deep mindfulness, is informed by eastern philosophy, and my personal meditation practice, yoga, conscious dance practice, and the belief that working to heal our trauma opens us to greater wholeness and expansion.

I am passionate about transformation and growing from struggle and challenge to find more peace, joy, ease and fun.

Some of my other passions

I am a huge fan of poetry and soulful writing and I believe it can be a powerful path to healing. So you'll find that my courses include the occasional poem and quote from the authors who have helped me in my own dark nights of the soul.

I'm also a bit of a foodie - one day I'd like to go on Masterchef!

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Giving Back

It's important to me to support causes I care about. As Real Relating grows a percentage of profit will go to good causes and this makes me very happy!

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